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🙃 #1
Inspired by my 1-hour old baby photo from September 25th 1968. I've always wondered about the nurses/doctors who held me before handing me over to Mama. Was there joy in their eyes? And did they pass that along to me.
Mama said I had the biggest brown eyes. Papa said I looked, 'feo', ugly. I laughed when he told me this. When I think of this moment, I think of Herman Hesse and his words from his book Demian.
'If we were not something more than unique human beings, if each one of us could really be done with once and for all by a single bullet, storytelling would lose all purpose. But every man is more than just himself; he also represents the unique, the very special and always significant and remarkable point at which the world's phenomena intersect, only once in this way and never again. This is why every man's story is important, eternal, sacred; that is why every man, as long as he lives and fulfills the will of nature, is wondrous, and worthy of consideration.'
Mama said I had the biggest brown eyes. Papa said I looked, 'feo', ugly. I laughed when he told me this. When I think of this moment, I think of Herman Hesse and his words from his book Demian.
'If we were not something more than unique human beings, if each one of us could really be done with once and for all by a single bullet, storytelling would lose all purpose. But every man is more than just himself; he also represents the unique, the very special and always significant and remarkable point at which the world's phenomena intersect, only once in this way and never again. This is why every man's story is important, eternal, sacred; that is why every man, as long as he lives and fulfills the will of nature, is wondrous, and worthy of consideration.'
🙃 #2
Inspired by one of my early 2013 SHEƎPISMS ... ‘Born to be SHEƎP’. At the moment we’re born, the essence of who we are exists. We're born to be no else but our essence. It’s pure, it’s raw, it's beautiful. It’s ewe. In Alicia Keys' biography, she writes, ‘I’m finally allowing myself to just be. Be giddy. Be irritable. Be vulnerable. Be silly. Be exhilarated … It's also my daily prayer for all of us- that we allow others the freedom of expression that we are learning to grant ourselves.’
Her words are a reminder to see others from this place, to see each other in our purest form, our essence of beauty, our essence to each other's universal connection.Who were ewe born to be?
Her words are a reminder to see others from this place, to see each other in our purest form, our essence of beauty, our essence to each other's universal connection.Who were ewe born to be?
🙃 #3
This upside down happy face is one of my 20 life symbols. It's a symbol of the moment we're born. As I age, I see my life regressing back to that purest form of energy. It’s my happy place.
At the moment of birth, we don’t know our name, our gender, our social class, our nationality, our religion, our sexual preference. We don’t even know our parents. This moment is our connection to one another when we know nothing and are only existing as life energy. At this moment, we, each one of us, are given the opportunity to share who YOU are with OUR world.
At the moment of birth, we don’t know our name, our gender, our social class, our nationality, our religion, our sexual preference. We don’t even know our parents. This moment is our connection to one another when we know nothing and are only existing as life energy. At this moment, we, each one of us, are given the opportunity to share who YOU are with OUR world.
🙃 #4
A portrait of Mama inspired by my favorite photo of hers. I like to say, 'I get to love the way that I love, because she loved the way that she loved.' She was love in its purest form. In 2018, she passed away. I often feel her with me, not as an angel, but as love alongside me. When I think about her, I don't look up into the skies. She's not up there, she's here, right here. As a kid, I heard her say that all she wanted was to have paz en el corazon, peace in her heart. These words have resonated with me all through the years. Months before she passed away, I got to experience what these words meant.
🙃 #5
As a kid, I remember my grandmother, Mama Chana, drawing flowers. Mama said I got my creativity from her. These white flowers are another of my life symbols. A symbol of creativity and inspiration.
I feel lucky and greatful that I get to be an artist, that I get to bring to life all the little voices and visions in my head. Woohoo!
P.S… I usually do 5 white flowers in my work because of the 5 siblings. In this piece, I did 8 white flowers. The additional 3 represent Mama, Papa, and in the corner, Mama Chana.
I feel lucky and greatful that I get to be an artist, that I get to bring to life all the little voices and visions in my head. Woohoo!
P.S… I usually do 5 white flowers in my work because of the 5 siblings. In this piece, I did 8 white flowers. The additional 3 represent Mama, Papa, and in the corner, Mama Chana.
🙃 #6
LA LA …my LITTLEZ inspired by my love for LA. I was born and braised in East LA. I love this city. It’s shaped who I am.
For 10 years, I left LA. When I returned, life was coming full circle. It was the perfect city to start over again. Of all cities, this is where my true passion for walking began. I put on my sneakers and walked and walked. I’ve been back for 25 years and have no plans of living anywhere else. It continues to be my new beginning.
For 10 years, I left LA. When I returned, life was coming full circle. It was the perfect city to start over again. Of all cities, this is where my true passion for walking began. I put on my sneakers and walked and walked. I’ve been back for 25 years and have no plans of living anywhere else. It continues to be my new beginning.
🙃 #7
It’s SHEƎP Baby. One of my 1st characters from 2013. It's a nod to Keith Haring’s iconic baby. No other artist has left an imprint like him. I think of him as my soul buddy. This project is inspired by him. He said an artist should be able to finish a painting in one day.
When I sketched my first SHEƎP and found the shape, I knew I'd found my voice. It was like Keith finding his baby.
Featuring LITTLEZ: KIKI, NEWBY, FLOW & ALICE.
My LITTLEZ are inspired by things I love. They're an extension of SHEƎP. Like a baby, they’re simple and happy peppy.
When I sketched my first SHEƎP and found the shape, I knew I'd found my voice. It was like Keith finding his baby.
Featuring LITTLEZ: KIKI, NEWBY, FLOW & ALICE.
My LITTLEZ are inspired by things I love. They're an extension of SHEƎP. Like a baby, they’re simple and happy peppy.
🙃 #8
A portrait of Papa inspired by an old photo before he got married. As a teenager I hated him. I even tried taking my life so that he would hurt. But as soon as I stepped on the campus at Cal … the hate disappeared. I understood what he had done for all of us …his hard work allowed us the gift of education, it altered the course of my life.
Nowadays, Papa and I have a good relationship. He’s attended my shows and has watched me paint some murals.
P.S… Because of him, I have the best work ethic ever!
Nowadays, Papa and I have a good relationship. He’s attended my shows and has watched me paint some murals.
P.S… Because of him, I have the best work ethic ever!
🙃 #9
JOLLY is one of my LITTLEZ. It's inspired by my love for beans. It's a reminder of my connection to Mama and Papa. While pregnant with me, Mama said she hated the smell of them cooking. While the beans cooked, she'd sit outside under the guava tree. Yet she cooked them for Papa, who eventually learned to make them for himself when Mama got sick with ALS. I too make my own and can eat them everyday.
P.S… At the time, 25 JOLLYS represented the number of peeps in my immediate family.
P.S… At the time, 25 JOLLYS represented the number of peeps in my immediate family.
🙃 #10
Oooops! …I love this word and the sounds of it. Life’s not about being perfect … Making mistakes along the way is all part of the journey …often, they're spotlights that allow us to shine!
This past year, this word popped into my being, and I loved it. While painting a hoodie, I made a mistake on the back … to fix it, I wrote the word ‘oooops’ to point out the mistake … At that moment it triggered an idea. It’s ok. I’m ok, e(we) are all OK!
This past year, this word popped into my being, and I loved it. While painting a hoodie, I made a mistake on the back … to fix it, I wrote the word ‘oooops’ to point out the mistake … At that moment it triggered an idea. It’s ok. I’m ok, e(we) are all OK!
🙃 #11
True story … A stranger at a bar once told me that I was like a rare bird who’d soar from magnificent cliffs. After he finished painting a picture in my head, he paused, looked me in the eyes and asked, ‘Why do you keep coming back?’
At the time, I remember thinking how strange and beautiful it was to have a stranger paint a picture of how I'd lived and had been living my life. I've taken my risks, have lived life on my terms, but somehow, I kept coming back to safety. I wasn't willing to fully soar.
His words have always stayed with me. On January 23, 2019, I was let go from a job of 15 years. At that moment, I knew exactly what I needed to do. I was going to soar and not come back. That day, I started my art career full time. There was no plan B. This symbol is inspired by my love for this story, a reminder that there’s no going back ... And that no matter what I, will soar with the flow of the winds.
At the time, I remember thinking how strange and beautiful it was to have a stranger paint a picture of how I'd lived and had been living my life. I've taken my risks, have lived life on my terms, but somehow, I kept coming back to safety. I wasn't willing to fully soar.
His words have always stayed with me. On January 23, 2019, I was let go from a job of 15 years. At that moment, I knew exactly what I needed to do. I was going to soar and not come back. That day, I started my art career full time. There was no plan B. This symbol is inspired by my love for this story, a reminder that there’s no going back ... And that no matter what I, will soar with the flow of the winds.
🙃 #12
A portrait of my grandmother, Mama Chana. Her name was Feliciana Torres. As a kid, I remember her drawing flowers. A couple of years ago, my sister Blanca found these drawings and knew they belonged to me. This SHEEP Moonster is Guardian of: Inspiration. D.O.B. 12.16.20. #317.
Mama Chana had long straight hair. Once, I remember watching her comb her hair and put it up in a bun. I don't recall ever seeing her without her bun. Because I also remember her wearing blue smocks. I think of her when I see lite baby blue colors.
Mama Chana had long straight hair. Once, I remember watching her comb her hair and put it up in a bun. I don't recall ever seeing her without her bun. Because I also remember her wearing blue smocks. I think of her when I see lite baby blue colors.
🙃 #13
‘THIS IS IT’ ... Many years ago, while on a walk, this phrase came to mind and the simplicity and magic struck a nerve. It's 3 words, 4 letters ... They remind me to be present in the moment. In painting this piece, I went with the flow of energy … and this is it. This is what came from being in flow.
I often remind myself of these words… Life’s not about what happened yesterday or what we expect to happen after work or during the weekend. e.g. Life’s about right now … like right now, I’m typing on my phone figuring out my IG post. This is it… what’s your ‘it’ right now?
I often remind myself of these words… Life’s not about what happened yesterday or what we expect to happen after work or during the weekend. e.g. Life’s about right now … like right now, I’m typing on my phone figuring out my IG post. This is it… what’s your ‘it’ right now?
🙃 #14
I’m a 1st generation Mexican American. LITTLEZ: XXY is inspired by my love for being Mexican. As a kid there was shame, shame for not speaking English like the kids at school or on TV. Shame because I felt and looked different. Then everything changed once I left home. As a 20 year old at Cal, there was pride. There was pride for the culture and for the sense of family instilled in us. There was pride for being me as I was ... as I am.
P.S. I'm proud that my parents came to the US. They came with no money and a third/sixth grade education. They came and created a family. They provided 5 kids with the best education and values. Like trees, they planted roots that keep growing and giving.
P.S. I'm proud that my parents came to the US. They came with no money and a third/sixth grade education. They came and created a family. They provided 5 kids with the best education and values. Like trees, they planted roots that keep growing and giving.
🙃 #15
15. MLK … it’s his birthday January 15th 1929. Many years ago, reading his autobiography left a giant imprint. The possibility of making anything come through starts with a clear vision and unwavering dedication. It's unbelievable, what he was able to create and leave behind for us. A model of perseverance, determination, love, kindness, strength and will.
The one phrase that stuck out to me in his I Have a Dream speech is ‘We cannot walk alone.’ It sort of summed up everything. How often do we get consumed with our own lives, not realizing that we do not and cannot walk this earth alone. WE … each and everyone of us, are all connected … past, present and future.
The one phrase that stuck out to me in his I Have a Dream speech is ‘We cannot walk alone.’ It sort of summed up everything. How often do we get consumed with our own lives, not realizing that we do not and cannot walk this earth alone. WE … each and everyone of us, are all connected … past, present and future.
🙃 #16
Every night as I lay my head down on my pillow, I tell myself out loud, I love ewe Ricky.’ I feel it, I mean it. Sometimes I’ll interchange Ricky with Papi, Papito. Sometimes …Papa. Since papa means potato in Spanish, I’ll say, ‘I love ewe potato.’
There’s a sense of great joy going to bed each night. The idea of dreaming has become a passion. It’s like going to the movies each night, but without popcorn. Over the years my nightly rituals and dream life have altered the course of life. I continue to be amazed at the experiences and inspirations coming through will I dream.
LITTLEZ: PAPI, DREAMY, & SOCRATES
Do ewe keep any nightly or morning rituals?
There’s a sense of great joy going to bed each night. The idea of dreaming has become a passion. It’s like going to the movies each night, but without popcorn. Over the years my nightly rituals and dream life have altered the course of life. I continue to be amazed at the experiences and inspirations coming through will I dream.
LITTLEZ: PAPI, DREAMY, & SOCRATES
Do ewe keep any nightly or morning rituals?
🙃 #17
Portrait: Violet Chachki a-la Patrick Nagel
In the early 90’s, while coming out, I fell in love with drag. I not only admired the artistry and SHEƎPnanigans, I admired the courage of these queens, to go out into the world and be. They felt like superheroes.
I'm not sure why, but more than any other drag queen, I dream of Violet the most. There’s something about her that vibes with my eyes. Her drag is just uniquely beautiful and sexy. I've never met her, but I love when I feel connections with peeps like this.
In the early 90’s, while coming out, I fell in love with drag. I not only admired the artistry and SHEƎPnanigans, I admired the courage of these queens, to go out into the world and be. They felt like superheroes.
I'm not sure why, but more than any other drag queen, I dream of Violet the most. There’s something about her that vibes with my eyes. Her drag is just uniquely beautiful and sexy. I've never met her, but I love when I feel connections with peeps like this.
🙃 #18
As a joke on selfie culture, I took my 1st SHEƎP portrait at the end of 2103. It’s a form of drag that allows me to bring my art to life. For about 7 years, I took a weekly portrait and posted it on Instagram every Friday. At the end of 2022. I stopped doing them. That year, using my SHEƎP Moonsters as inspiration, I made 52 different cardboard masks.
This collage piece is more of a self portrait than others. I used photos of my own eyes and lips. It also features some of my other portraits.
P.S. Collage is a favorite medium. I, especially, love the playfulness of being resourceful. In some ways, drag art is a form of collage.
This collage piece is more of a self portrait than others. I used photos of my own eyes and lips. It also features some of my other portraits.
P.S. Collage is a favorite medium. I, especially, love the playfulness of being resourceful. In some ways, drag art is a form of collage.
🙃 #19
A few months before Mama died, I had a clear moment of joy. I was reading a book while riding a stationary bicycle at the gym. I looked up and out the window. Nothing happened, but everything changed. I continued reading my book knowing that life would never be the same. I realized that joy was the 'paz en el corazon' that I heard Mama speak of.
I feel lucky and 'greatful' to have arrived at that moment. It’s like I have a super power that can’t ever be taken away. If I'm having an off day, I let it be, knowing that joy is here. Joy is not something I feel once in a while. Joy is not fleeting. Joy is being, quietly existing. It's who I am. It's who we all are.
I feel lucky and 'greatful' to have arrived at that moment. It’s like I have a super power that can’t ever be taken away. If I'm having an off day, I let it be, knowing that joy is here. Joy is not something I feel once in a while. Joy is not fleeting. Joy is being, quietly existing. It's who I am. It's who we all are.
🙃 #20
In February 2013, I read a quote in an Alexander McQueen biography. He referred to himself, not as black sheep of the family, but as a pink sheep of the family. At the moment of seeing and reading the words, I knew that my life was forever altered.
Without a clue of what to do with this concept, the next day, I bought a toy SHEƎP and I started doodling. In those doodles, I found the shape. For the first four years, I made sure to stay focused and to honor all the inspirations coming through. At times, it was overwhelming.
I can’t imagine what life would be had I not been open to seeing those words. Had I read them at another point in my life, I may not have received them with an open heart. In 2012, I struggled through a tough year. Toward the end of the year, as I was coming out of darkness, I was craving something new. It showed up in a book. Because of this, I like to say, ‘Read a book’.
Without a clue of what to do with this concept, the next day, I bought a toy SHEƎP and I started doodling. In those doodles, I found the shape. For the first four years, I made sure to stay focused and to honor all the inspirations coming through. At times, it was overwhelming.
I can’t imagine what life would be had I not been open to seeing those words. Had I read them at another point in my life, I may not have received them with an open heart. In 2012, I struggled through a tough year. Toward the end of the year, as I was coming out of darkness, I was craving something new. It showed up in a book. Because of this, I like to say, ‘Read a book’.
🙃 #21
Featuring LITTLEZ: YO YO. It’s inspired by me and my love for myself. I’m lucky and ‘greatful’ that I’ve felt it throughout life. 'YO’ is an interjection to greet someone. It can also mean here. (Like, YO, I'm right here). In Spanish, Yo means me. I love this word cause there’s a sense of seeing your reflection in others.
P.S… in the 90s, as Mr. Gay Latino, I got to ride in a red convertible for SF Pride. I wore only sneakers and white Calvin Klein mini underwear. On the back of the underwear, in red lettering, I ironed-on the phrase, Yo Baby! As the car drove down the street, I shook my booty ... The crowds chanted Yo baby, yo baby! It's a memory I'll never forget. I believe it's also where the word came into my existence and secretly waited for me to bring it back.
P.S… in the 90s, as Mr. Gay Latino, I got to ride in a red convertible for SF Pride. I wore only sneakers and white Calvin Klein mini underwear. On the back of the underwear, in red lettering, I ironed-on the phrase, Yo Baby! As the car drove down the street, I shook my booty ... The crowds chanted Yo baby, yo baby! It's a memory I'll never forget. I believe it's also where the word came into my existence and secretly waited for me to bring it back.
🙃 #22
Since childhood, Mama instilled in the 5 of us the importance of keeping our bonds between siblings. When painting, this is why I often repeat images in 5’s. My siblings mean the world to me. I love them mucho and I feel incredible love from them. Lucky me.
P.S. A few years ago, the 5 of us were in a car running XMAS errands. I cracked a joke about something and before we knew it we were all riffing on it and couldn’t stop laughing. The moment is ingrained in my memory. By that time, Mama had passed away, but it felt like we were back to being 5 little kids.
P.S. A few years ago, the 5 of us were in a car running XMAS errands. I cracked a joke about something and before we knew it we were all riffing on it and couldn’t stop laughing. The moment is ingrained in my memory. By that time, Mama had passed away, but it felt like we were back to being 5 little kids.
🙃 #23
As a kid, I had questions about god that went unanswered. Like ... ‘Why weren’t the dinosaurs in the Bible?’ Eventually I stopped believing. In January 2016, I started my #GOD series as a way to playfully ask questions to peeps on the streets … some food for thought.
P.S… I’ll never forget when I 1st told Papa that I wasn’t going to church. I was 17, it was Sunday and everyone was ready to go. I got up the courage to say, 'I'm not going, I don't believe in it anymore.' He looked at me with disdain. He asked, ‘When you’re sick and dying, who are you going to pray to?’ I didn’t respond, but some 15 years later when I was in the hospital and close to death, I didn’t pray. Instead, I forgave myself and I observed life as it was. It was my first moment of feeling real joy.
P.S… I’ll never forget when I 1st told Papa that I wasn’t going to church. I was 17, it was Sunday and everyone was ready to go. I got up the courage to say, 'I'm not going, I don't believe in it anymore.' He looked at me with disdain. He asked, ‘When you’re sick and dying, who are you going to pray to?’ I didn’t respond, but some 15 years later when I was in the hospital and close to death, I didn’t pray. Instead, I forgave myself and I observed life as it was. It was my first moment of feeling real joy.
🙃 #24
Buddhist SHEƎPmonks ... They’re a symbol of a soft belly place. Over the years, I’ve learned to put my hands on my belly as a reminder of my connection to life and everyone.
Over the years, as a way to fall asleep, I started nightly breathing exercises. I’d put my hand on my belly and count to 100. If I lost count, I’d start again. Eventually I’d fall asleep. The process is a little different now, but breathing is still a big part.
P.S… when I put my hand on my bellybutton I think of Mama. My umbilical cord was connected to her. Mama was connected to Mana Chana. Mama Chana was connected to her mother … and so on. This connection takes us all back to a SAME place ... the source of LIFE.
Over the years, as a way to fall asleep, I started nightly breathing exercises. I’d put my hand on my belly and count to 100. If I lost count, I’d start again. Eventually I’d fall asleep. The process is a little different now, but breathing is still a big part.
P.S… when I put my hand on my bellybutton I think of Mama. My umbilical cord was connected to her. Mama was connected to Mana Chana. Mama Chana was connected to her mother … and so on. This connection takes us all back to a SAME place ... the source of LIFE.
🙃 #25
A portrait of Oscar Meza. I like to think of him as OM. My sacred place where I'm at peace with myself.
In high school, he was the boy I wished to be. He was funny, smart, beautiful, punk rock and a star athlete. Even the teachers loved him. As the suicidal goth weirdo, who’d almost given up, it was seeing Oscar in school that helped me get by. I last saw him on graduation day. He was running late and toward the line of boys waiting to start the ceremony.
A few years later, while at Cal, I looked in a bathroom mirror and, for the first time, I saw love in my eyes. All the qualities I admired in Oscar were in me. They always had been. Like Dorothy, it was a matter of seeing them for myself.
After college, I started writing a book called ‘Searching for Oscar … and When the Beans No Longer Jump.’ It was a coming of age story with Oscar as the protagonist. I struggled with it and eventually let it go.
P.S… Oscar and I weren’t friends in high school. But 10 years after graduation, I looked him up. I had the courage to call him and tell him about what he meant to me. Nowadays, we chat over the phone as friends, but we have yet to meet in person.
In high school, he was the boy I wished to be. He was funny, smart, beautiful, punk rock and a star athlete. Even the teachers loved him. As the suicidal goth weirdo, who’d almost given up, it was seeing Oscar in school that helped me get by. I last saw him on graduation day. He was running late and toward the line of boys waiting to start the ceremony.
A few years later, while at Cal, I looked in a bathroom mirror and, for the first time, I saw love in my eyes. All the qualities I admired in Oscar were in me. They always had been. Like Dorothy, it was a matter of seeing them for myself.
After college, I started writing a book called ‘Searching for Oscar … and When the Beans No Longer Jump.’ It was a coming of age story with Oscar as the protagonist. I struggled with it and eventually let it go.
P.S… Oscar and I weren’t friends in high school. But 10 years after graduation, I looked him up. I had the courage to call him and tell him about what he meant to me. Nowadays, we chat over the phone as friends, but we have yet to meet in person.
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